A few days ago a couple of friends and I were talking about the first time we fell in love. Both of them had a lot of things to say about their first foray into that thing that drives most of us a tad nuts.
Remarkably, they confessed to have indeed went mad in their first relationships (and I shall not go into the details of that coz I assume they read this blog).
I tried my best to ask as many questions about their "cases", hoping that they'd exhaust themselves answering my queries and that I'd successfully dodge being asked about my case as well, which was how the conversation exactly turned out: an interrogation I manipulated.
Thinking about my first relationship still makes me cringe, albeit with a streak of amusement rather than of bitterness. Well OK, I'm still embarrassed about it, hence I avoid any chance of discussing its details.
I knew I went freaking crazy then and if anything it says about my high propensity to be quite stupid when in love.
Well, I have the best excuse for being rash... I was young then. Basta, the story of my first love is full of embarrassing, juvenile whimsy, which we have the right to at least once in our life.
Thinking about it last night, I said punyeta if I'm going to go through with this tale in my head again I might as well post it on the blog para naman maaliw ang publique ko. For the sake of shared amusement ba. And we all know how much steam this blog lacks, di ba?
Hay, intricately going through such an excuse is taking up so much space ha, might as well move on to the story... keri?
I was twenty-one then, fresh from the university and so I was just hanging out and jobless in Surigao. His mobile number was given to me by a friend whom he was chatting with on MIRC (gosh, does anyone still use this at all? Shows how ooooold I really am, no?).
Itago natin sya sa pangalang W1. He was based in Cebu and was an architecture student then.
Anyway, this is the classic tale of a textmate (the bayot cringes here). We were just texting galore for a few months until I moved to Davao to work. We occasionally met in MIRC as well. So basically, that's how we maintained the friendship for months.
I could not exactly remember how and why we became "intimate" with our SMSes and chatting. Perhaps we were both bored, but sometime in December 2001 we agreed that we become lovers (again, I cringe here).
Lord, that was my first time to fall in love, I swear.
Basta, just thinking of him took my breath away and it was kilig all over the place for me. It does not help that he was really, really sweet (whatever that means) so tuluyan nang nahulog na ang loob ng bakla, di ba?
Beyond any logic, I fell in love with someone whom I have not met yet; but despite that I felt that the relationship was real.
I jumped into my idea of how I should act as someone who is committed to a person he loves. I did not date anyone and I showed him that I really cared.
Two months into the relationship I had the chance to travel to Cebu with my family.
We met in... what's that mall? Uhmmm... Glorietta Cebu at Bo's Coffee Shop, to be precise. Having seen his picture before, I still could not help being swooned by his gorgeous Chinese looks. He had this exquisitely androgynous face and a naughty smile. He was a lot shorter than I am but he had the smoothest skin and delicate eyes.
I remember him sitting under some sort of accent lighting in the dim coffeshop. In my eyes he practically glowed. My most memorable image was of him gently licking his full lips after taking a sip from his coffee cup.
It was extremely surreal to be in his company. For months I was loving someone who just existed in my head and our proximity that evening made everything that I felt for him absolute.
After a couple of hours of awkward chikahan, we took a cab to a motel. Sogo: somewhere near the University of San Carlos. Classic, di ba?
Gosh, I know I'm a slut. Oh, a virgin slut at that. While in that cab I remember thinking to my self: "Dios mio, ma-devirginize ka na nga sa motel pa." How romantic, no?
Anyway, I'd skip the details of that night in a motel room with red lighting. Basta, it went surprisingly well, thanks to the dozens and dozens of gay porn I watched, proving the education value of Belami, Randy Blue, Sean Cody, and their ilk. But that will be another post. ;-)
The next day, my family and I went back to Surigao. While on the overnight boat, his scent still lingered in my memory.
That was the first and last time I'd see W1.
To be continued...