Life Begins Here?

In a few weeks I'm making that big leap to the big three-oh. I know I look like I'm 22, sometimes even 19, but there's no denying that I'm inevitably a victim of the passing of time. Not that I'm particularly terrorized by age. In fact since in my early twenties I've been wishing I'm thirty-something instead.

I started working when I was 21 and at that time my colleagues were mostly in their early to mid 30s. Mingling with these people, they caught my fancy right away.

I was struck by their aura of confidence and savoire-faire, versus my self-consciousness for instance. Many of them had a good career experience so they were always decisive at work and could face all kinds of people with ease.

I also found out that people in their thirties are more financially stable while at the same time they are not caught up in materialism, unlike people in their twenties who must have the latest cell phone and such unnecessary whims while earning entry-level salaries.

As I got closer to my colleagues, I was endlessly captured by the stories of their lives. I was a rapt listener to their anecdotes. Some had gone through failed relationships but emerged from these experiences stronger. Some were doting parents to their kids and could think beyond their limited self-interests.

I don't know, they seem to just live much fuller lives and are not drawn to the impulses and recklessness of the young.

And always they shared to me some lessons in life (perhaps some of them had to learn it the hard way). One office-mate said our twenties are some of the most crucial years in our lives because that's when we make key decisions - e.g. getting married, having kids, taking a particular career path, etc. - that affect how the rest of our lives go.

Another colleague said we should enjoy our twenties because it's that time of our lives when we're most physically beautiful and desirable, and when we reach our thirties everything just starts to sag. (OMG, I should've listened! I used to take for granted - even hate - my metabolism. Sigh.)

 

But I think the most important lesson I learned is: to go through our 20s with mindfulness. I was told it's easy to live life with abandon, which is a good approach to life to a certain extent. At the same time, however, we should be aware of the consequences of our actions and that decisions should be guided by our values.

In fact, our twenties is a time when we supposedly find out who we are, what we believe in, our convictions. Figuring those out is one of the foundations of facing life with confidence, I was told.

Eventually, many of these people became some of my SUPER close friends, with whom I still keep in touch until now. In fact for quite some time many of my friends were at least ten years older than me. I surely look up to them. I don't know, but I always find them more insightful and sure-footed than people my age, and these are the qualities that I like to have as well that's why I gravitated towards them.

My experience with my friends in their 30s somehow influenced me to attach "maturity", "stability", and "self-confidence" to a specific age range. I must've overlooked the fact that not everyone younger than thirty is immature and the other way around.

Well, obviously I romanticized thirty-something-hood (and beyond).

So I'm stepping into my thirties. This is it, life supposedly begins here. I'm excited to reach this threshold after waiting for it for so many years. But I guess I have to find out if being in my 30s is as good as I thought it would be. I have a decade to reach for an answer.