A number of my former colleagues came to Bangkok last Monday and for the umpteenth time I was yet again the de facto tourist guide that evening. I have to call the Tourism Authority of Thailand for my commission, given how many times I've been a guide for any friend from Las Islas Filipinas who comes for a visit.
For this batch, my services were needed for their visit to Patpong, one of the few red light districts in BKK. Oh dear, here we go again. I'm obviously not a big fan of the infamous ping pong shows. Like duh, I'm allergic to pussies. I've seen one show last year anyway (see entry here), also when a friend stopped-over in BKK. Tell me, how many times does one need to see bananas, eggs, razor blades, cigarettes, sparklers, darts, and ping pong balls and pussies together?
But then, somebody has to do it for my friends, especially coz my experience of going there for the first time was quite unnerving and I am by now considered as the more experienced among the lot (my goodness). So there, cunts were again splayed right before me, the owners of which obviously bored of the nightly routine. With the look on their faces, I can almost hear the performers thinking: Oh dear, another ping pong out of my cunt. When will this night end? I still have a load of laundry to do later.
Exactly, how exciting can that get? My lady friends were quite amused though. They squirmed, shrieked, clapped, and gasped every time the super vajayjays spew something out of those crevices.
Welcome to Thailand! I don't get it, to be honest. Among the many wonders this country has to offer, tourists still opt to go to the cliche of all cliches. I've always thought that those places are dehumanizing to both the spectators and the performers. BUT, I have to note here that I don't judge on moral grounds the people who go there, consumers that we are of this whole enterprise. Still, I've decided that that should be the last time I'm bringing anyone to Patpong or any similar place.
Photo Credit: Patpong Sisters