Saturday, August 08, 2009

Same Same

Now that I've started talking about Asian beauties in my previous post, let's talk about me, shall we? (Did a lightning just hit me?)

If everyone who mistakes me for being Thai were to pay me I would have a dozen Bottega Veneta bags by now. Oh maybe plus the entire spring-summer 2009 collection of Etro.

I'm reminded of this because I just came back from the grocery store where for the umpteenth time the cashier started talking to me in Thai (about the condoms I bought having expired or something... kidding!). I had to tell her: "Khor tod mai kao jai, phom pood pasa Thai mai dai kha" (Sorry I don't understand, I don't speak Thai, bitch) while I feign a puzzled expression on my face.

And as is always the case, she chuckled and asked where I come from. I gave her my signature half-smile, half-pout and declared proudly: "I'm Brazilian... ooops, I'm from the Philippines".

I swear this happened three times today in a span of four hours. Imagine having to deal with that question on a daily basis? (Not really.) I don't know, I'm even thinking of getting a tattoo on my forehead saying: I'm a Pinoy bakla.

Aside from people assuming I'm Thai, many also ask if I'm a Brazilian model. How dare they think I'm a model! I don't know, it must also be my Brazilian accent?

Anyway, kidding aside, when I was also in Vietnam the locals think I'm Vietnamese. Ditto in Malaysia, Indonesia, Cambodia, and Laos. My face is so quintessentially Southeast Asian I could represent the entire region in the Miss Universe.

Once Fuchsiaboy quipped: "I'm like Cambodia, I'm full of wonders."

Then I'm like Malaysia... I'm truly Asia.

But wait, I'm also like Thailand... I'm amazing. I'm like Vietnam... I'm the hidden charm. I'm like Laos... I'm the jewel of the Mekong. I'm like Myanmar... I'm mystical. I'm like Singapore... I'm swinging.

But really, I'm like the Philippines... I'm simply WOW!

Perhaps the most classic reply to the "where do you come from" question is from BFF Bubbles de Araneta who replied with his usual panache in taking things: "I'm from Asia!". I swear he said this. He is indeed the soul of Asia, no? Much like Seoul!


Dawn Selya said...

that's funny. you can blend in so easily in any place you choose to live in because you look "local" ? that's ridiculous, preposterous! you are so cosmopolitan that you put Cosmo in shame. you got it girl! :)

fuchsiaboy said...


Lyka Bergen said...

Hahahha! Shining true!... through!

(I wonder what you will be called in Bhutan).

Bryan Anthony said...

very witty-ness and funny ate!

Your so Laos... joke!


Anonymous said...

Swinging Singapore! Indeed! From tree to tree! Hah!

kawadjan said...

Girls... I can't wait to be mistaken for Belorussian.


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