Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Major Major Tape Measure Challenge

Fuchsiaboy and Betty, who are both based in Khmerlandia, were in BKK over the weekend to finally settle the age-old Preah Vihear dispute. Ay wait, let's not go that direction because I don't want to be deported from Siam.

We in fact wanted to solve the mystery of who among us girls have the the smallest waistline.

We all know that waistline is a serious business for me. I have been starving through 2010 in preparation for the most critical competition there is. I have lived a diet of peanuts and fruit juice these past months in the hope of being in top shape for this day.

And so, ladies and gentlemen, I'm not going to delay the tension here.

First contestant is La Donita Rose of Siem Reap! Half-Belgian, half-Japanese, La Donita's motto in life is "To couture or not to couture, that is the question." His biggest mistake in life wearingh the glorified trapo creations of Eairth by Melissa Dizon.

Second contestant is... ay, the second contestant is La Greta, the Sirena of Surigao. Half-tilapia, half-lapu-lapu, La Greta believes in the saying "Clavicles are the new cleavage." His biggest mistake in life is... no, he does not make mistakes because he is perfect.

And the third contestant is Betty La Fea the Belle of Belgium. Betty speaks Flemish and French with an Ilocano accent and he believes that "I did not expect to be in the tough ten." (Profound ang lola nyo!). His biggest mistake in life is wearing the same Don Protasio top that La Bubbles wore on the same night. Fashion faux pas nang major-major!

The results!

Coming in at a shocking 34 inches is... La Donita! (Well, that was rather expected, after all, La Donita had been spotted frequenting the Siem Reap branch of Swensen lately.)

First runner-up, at 29 inches is... La Greta! (Who, after learning of his poor performance, completely lost his mind and had been sighted roaming around the dark sois of Bangkok like a deranged katoey.)

And running away with the crown, at 27 1/2 inches, is the cadaverish, Betty la Fea, who will walk away with a box of A4 paper and a bottle of fish sauce that will nourish him for the next 12 months.

See you in the next pageant, girls! (Di pa tapos ang laban!)


Boonie S said...

Great post, and you all look good.
My wife prefers to measure ‘how-big’ rather than ‘how-small’ though.

Have a good day, Boonie

Franco Dionco said...

love it! Moriam Quiambao lang drama mo teh.

Atleast if no dethrone ako, ikaw na ang reigning queen. As if it'll happen. LOL


fuchsiaboy said...

ang daya naman kasi pinakain nyo ako ng pinakain tapos makapal pa ang fabric ng damit ko.

at teka anu ang nangyari sa measurement ni bubbles? hahaha!

the spool artist said...

grabe ang excuses ni fuchsiaboy! can't get over the fact na umuwi siya with only the Miss Congeniality sash in tow... kasalanan talaga yan ng Celebrity Brownie sa Swensen's! Don't worry K, for us ikaw pa rin ang Most Photogenic! hehehe

kiel estrella said...

nahulog ako sa silya sa katatawa. kung nandyan ako na-agaw ko sana kay donita ang ms. congeniality title.

kawadjan, peanuts? seriously?! so greasy - i'm disappointed. kala ko pa naman you stick to your office suplies diet composed of bond papers, printer ink and staple wires.

sayang wasn't able to meet you when you were in manille. i'll be in chiang mai 10-11. contemplating on taking a side trip to bang-cock...

kiel estrella said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mel beckham said...

Hahahaha! Love this post, major major fun! Congrats kay Betty.

In furnace, hindi halatang 34 ang waistline ni Ate Don.

Meanwhile Ate G, peanuts lang talaga? I wish I had your discipline. Hahaha

Mac Callister said...

hehehe very funny post,paliitan ng waistline!saya! di ako sasali jan matatalo ako LOL!


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