Thursday, March 20, 2008

Boys Will Be Boys

A recent MSN session with a friend went like this:

Zya: I'm seeing someone right now.
Akez: Good for you, dear.
Zya: The thing is, he has a boyfriend. I'm his 'mistress'!
Akez: Oh no...
Zya: Well, we see each other once a week, and we have fun. That's it.
Akez: But didn't your ex cheat on you also? That caused your breakup, right?
Zya: I know.
Akez: So why are you allowing yourself to be an accessory to cheating this time?
Zya: Hmmm... I guess I'm not up for a serious relationship right now.
Akez: So, does it justify anything?

I don't really get it. I know this guy as someone who's a cut above the rest. Well, that's what I thought. I couldn't be more disappointed that he fell in this whole cheating trap, although he's more of the "accessory" this time rather than its victim. I'm hardly judgmental of my friends, but I really lost respect for him, I'm sorry to say that.

Why am I seeing more of these? Cheating bastards! There are countless accounts/confessions in blogs and it breaks my heart every time I read them. (I swear, I have to stop reading some blogs at some point, they only give me a more pessimistic view of gay life.) Most of them have some way of justifying their infidelity and they always end up depressed and languishing in guilt. But they still do it anyway. And recently, I've heard of two friends who fell victim to the wandering dicks of their partners. Just the same, they fell into self-pity, regret, and hate.

It's quite unfortunate coz in the tricky world of gay dating, it seems we would all fall to cheating eventually. Is this a matter of who cheats who first? It sounds like a game to me and most gay men appear to just play along. I've heard it too often that it is the nature of men (whether gay or straight) to play around. So is it too much to expect that we all grow up somehow? As Miranda Priestly said: "Am I reaching for the stars here? I don't think so."


fuchsiaboy said...

it all boils down to choices. like dieting, exercise and sleeping around, we all have choices if we want the south beach or the zone; aerobics, pilates or yoga; to cheat or not to cheat. and sorry, the choices we make really do reflect what we really are, like buying fake louis vuittons.

'elegance is refusal'
-coco chanel

kawadjan said...

dahling, i hope it's that simple.
but the way men make their choices these days, i wonder if they ever use their head. ooops, the one up there i mean.

and, i DO buy fake vuitton.

Anonymous said...

e kasi minsan, masarap kumandirit. lalo na sa mga panahong feeling mo maiksi ang buhok mo pero ang tutuo ay mahaba ito.

yun lang.

Quentin X said...


kawadjan said...

giboinks: naman. in other words, pampalubag-loob ang paglalandi sa mga taong bumababa ang self-esteem. tama ba yun?

quentin: uh oh...

fuchsiaboy said...

pampalubag loob nga siguro sa mga taong bumababa ang self esteem because they will hook up with an attached guy just to feel mahaba ang buhok nila or buying fake louis vuitton to feel rich and in fashion.

it does reflect in a person a poor sense of values whenever he settle for something less other than the best.

if gays really and truly want to be respected then i guess it's time to clean up the act and start acting responsible.

buying fakes mean you support illegal child labor and terrorism. ganyan ka pala? chos!

kawadjan said...

don: kailangan ba talagang mag speech? lampas ka na sa 20 seconds na allowed sa final question ng miss universe.

at values ang pinaguusapan dito girl. add na natin dyan ang ethics and morals. may natutunan naman tayo sa GMRC subject natin di ba? kahit sa mababang paaralan lang ako nanggaling.

yun na. lampas na rin ako sa 20 seconds.

Kiks Phulumulu said...

pinaniwalaan ko yan dati - monogamy.


bumalik ang paniniwala ko sa kanya.

nakakaloka nga lang ang mga lalaking mamimeet mo at makaka-casual only to find out they have partners after.


kawadjan said...

hi kiks! salamat sa comments. parang ang sipag mo lately. salamat talaga... wala na po akong maidagdag.


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