A note to my 21-year-old self

Oh no, the last day of 2011. What a year for me! But I'm not going to look back on it in this post. I'd rather go back ten years ago when I was 21.

I've always thought of writing a "note to my XX-year-old self", so I chose to write to my 21-year-old self because 2001 was a pivotal year for me. For one, I graduated from university, hence, I entered the world of being a real adult. And most importantly, I lost my virginity when I was 21. Okay, okay, I'm a fucking late bloomer. Charot!

So what will I tell my 21-year-old self?

On life in general, I'd say: "Gurrrl, life is not always fair. Most of the time, in fact, life is just damn unfair. The sooner you accept that, the more at peace you'd be with life." Harsh, but true, chai mai?

On your goals: Keep them high, but also make the most of surprising opportunities. Don't be afraid to tweak your goals along the way; it's not a sign of failure, but it only means you can adapt.

On knowledge: Be hungry to learn new things. Read. Most of the time there's no practical reason for knowing these things except to exercise your mind, a worthy goal in itself. Travel. It costs a lot but you'd have a lifetime of memories.

On your skills: You'll never be a good singer. Focus on what you do well and keep on honing it because you can always be better. Also, learn new skills that you can be good at. But, again, you cannot sing.

On success: Don't feel entitled to success. You have to earn it. Work your ass off. You may not always have the results you want, but be proud of your efforts nonetheless, and be humble about your achievements.

On other people: Respect them all the time and they'd respect you back. Three words: empathize, empathize, empathize. Be mindful that everyone has a story.

On family: Continue loving them with all your might. Your parents are as human as you are, so be generous in affirming them you love them.

On friends: They come and go, most of them at least. But nurture the few ones who you feel would accept you in spite of you. You'd be lucky with your friends. They're all amazing and generous. You'd have them for life.

On men: All men think with their dicks. There are many nice, decent, loving ones, of course, but ultimately they are all driven by their cocks. Don't take it personally; it's just how nature programmed them, including yourself.

On sex: This will be your year, gurl. Just don't expect too much. There will be NO fireworks. With the right person though it can be quite special.

On beauty: Enjoy that18-inch waistline. It will stay for only another two years, and then it all goes downhill from there.

In conclusion: Be fearless. Take risks. Keep on learning. Enjoy your youth. Love your family. Treasure your friends. Life would be very kind to you. And, bitch, 31 is not as old as you think.

Favorite Things of 2011

It's that time of the year again when I list down my favorite "things"... for lack of a better term.

I really don't have a proper criteria, just that these are personal favorites from the year that's just about to end. These are the things that I felt were highlights of 2011, the things that make 2011 more memorable. (These books and films for instance didn't have to be released in 2011, but I had access to them in only 2011.)

So let's start.

My favorite film is "Dogtooth" (2009). This Greek film blew me away for its unusual depiction of parenting. It resonated with me because often I question to what extent parents should influence the "reality" that their children are exposed to. This movie has some answers that made me squirm.

My favorite documentary is "Exit Through the Gift Shop" (2010). This is one hilarious and irreverent documentary about street art, its driving forces, and how it has crept into the mainstream art market.

My favorite album is absolutely Adele's "21". I mean, haler!!! Enough said. I'm almost tempted to name Lady Gaga's "Born this Way", but I based my choice on the number of times I listened to each album, and "21" has been on loop in my computer since it was released. 

Which makes my favorite song "Someone Like You". I'm sure I'm not alone in naming it their favorite song of the year, and it's easy to understand why.

My favorite novel is "Room" (2010) by Emma Donoghue. It's very difficult to read it at times because of the horrific experience of its main characters. But it ends with a positive note, somehow. I've been recommending this novel to all my friends.

My favorite non-fiction book is "The Case for God" (2009) by renowned scholar Karen Armstrong. The book traces the history of religion (mainly the Abrahamic ones), its philosophy, and practice, and asserts that religion is transcendental and best known through practice. 

My favorite website is Piratebay. How on earth would I survive the year without this website where I get my movies and music, aber? I looooooove Piratebay! My second favorite website is Google Reader where I now read all my favorite blogs.

And my favorite blog is still "The Sartorialist". Scott Schuman's blog has evolved to featuring profiles and interviews of his subjects. But he is still consistent in his taste for classic and often times quirky fashion on the streets.

Talk about fashion, my favorite model this year is the androgynous model Andrej Pejic. Now he is the quintessential model: a chameleon. He is as good as a "male" model and as a "female" model. Truly, he represents fashion today, one that is undefinable and fearless. 

My favorite clothing brand at the moment is Uniqlo, which opened in Bangkok a few months ago. I love its basics because I'm now on a "basics" phase. It's a big plus Uniqlo is soooo affordable.

Lastly, my favorite trip of the year was my ten days in Myanmar (blog posts here and here). It's a country I've long wanted to visit and it did not disappoint. I was completely enamored of the colonial architecture in Yangon and the serenity of the beaches of Ngwe Saung. I'm definitely going back to Myanmar in 2012.

Happy New Year, my dear ten readers and thanks for still following the blog.

When NOT to go to Seoul

I almost didn't get a visa to Seoul because the embassy only had two days to process it. Usual processing time is three days. But because I was in Surigao and there was a Thai public holiday, I had to ask the embassy to reconsider my case.

The visa was issued to me the very same day I flew to Seoul with a number of colleagues for a two-day meeting.

I was already warned by our partner in Seoul that the weather was going to be below zero. Thank god, Uniqlo in BKK has some thermal underwear. I used to scoff at the racks where they sell warm clothes. Who needs them in Bangkok? Now I understand.

But nothing could have still prepared me for the weather in Seoul. The average temperature was something like -3... at daytime! One night we experienced -8! I'm not a fan of cold weather; and it was also my first time to experience winter.

Those thick coats we see on TV and the movies look cute all right, but NOT in real life, I realized. I just couldn't stand having to wear two socks, two underwear, a shirt, jumper, coat, scarf, hat, and gloves. Awful! And my skin was flaky and itchy as shit.

I hated my time in Seoul, whereas it was lovely autumn weather when we went there last year. This time around, going outside was just discouraging. I shivered like crazy the moment I stepped out of the hotel. At times I literally ran to the car from the hotel lobby.

Well, on my first day, I had the courage to go to the National Museum of Contemporary Art. It was a long subway ride. The museum is located in the mountains, a good contrast to the concrete and steel of downtown Seoul.

But other than that opportunity of exploring Seoul, we were mostly holed up in the warmth of the meeting room. Even shopping was not an option as they were selling winter clothes now. Duh.

I'd go back to Seoul anytime there's an opportunity though. It's a lovely city, with heritage and modern buildings sitting side by side. The shopping is not bad either. But definitely, I'd rather be on the right season when I go back there.

Last day in Surigao

I'm on my last full day in Surigao. It's another rainy day here; nothing surprising about it. And the neighbors are singing karaoke for all the village to hear. Nothing surprising about that as well. Okay, I'm not going to whine on my last day here.

My sister and brother also visited Surigao a couple of weeks ago. We went to the beach a couple of times and hung out with cousins and other relatives.

And then after Davao, I met some of my closest friends for some catching up on our lives. It always amazes me how much our lives change, in say 10 years. Our expectations from others, as well as from ourselves, are often very different from how they turn out to be. Not that I'm disappointed about my friends' lives... on contrary most of them are happy (as far as I can tell). I guess what I'm saying is that life is just fucking unexpected.

Just yesterday, I unearthed my box of mementoes in which I store old letters, among many other odd bits of papers. When we were in high school, my friends and I sent each other letters and notes. It's a lot of "thank you for being my friend" - you know, high school stuff. It's always reassuring that my friends and I have withstood the test of time and distance (thank you Facebook and email!).

Anyway, so that's all what this trip is all about. Just some much needed time with family and friends, and realizing the value of the people that are constantly in our lives in spite of the changes we all go through.

Now I'm ready to go back to Bangkok because frankly I'm now bored in Surigao... what can one do with all this rain, aber?

Visiting Davao

I'm in Las Islas Filipinas at the moment to visit family and friends. I intended to stay in my hometown, Surigao City, the two weeks I'm here. My mom has other ideas, though. She decided to drag me to Davao as she had been keen on visiting my sister who now lives there.

Davao was my home for about four years. I moved there after graduating from university and I worked in an NGO during my stay there. So over the years I have accumulated a number of close friends, with whom I've kept in touch over the years. 

Meeting them during my three-day visit was on top of my agenda (aside of course from spending time with my mom and sister). I wish I had more time to meet more of my friends and former colleagues, but I simply didn't have the time.

I had a bit of a chance as well to visit some places I used to frequent when I lived in Davao, in particular my former office, which has radically changed. Now I know only two people there and the rest are new employees. 

In terms of landscape, there are definitely heaps of changes in the city compared with the last time I visited it a couple of years ago. Well, there are more malls, if that's any sign of progress and definitely the city got more crowded and the traffic worse. Despite these changes, I still see the appeal of Davao's relatively more laid-back rhythm and cheaper cost of living.

It was definitely a short three days in Davao, but the trip was worthwhile... including the harrowing ten-hour bus ride back to Surigao.